Lead Balloon

New Year’s Holiday
January 2, 2007, 5:52 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

We went to the hockey game (Dallas Stars) for New Year’s Eve with Todd’s parents, brother, and our friend Vincent. It was a fun time. I don’t remember much of the hockey game, as Vincent and I spent our time giggling about the hockey heckler woman behind us. Words can’t explain how funny and irritating she was – relentlessly yelling, no…moaning, the entire time, the same three or four phrases over and over again, with the most irritating voice you’ve ever heard. I think what made it so funny is that she was literally in the last row – back up against the back wall of the arena, yelling at these players (her “guys”) as if they could hear her. Anyway, you had to be there to truly enjoy how funny it was, especially to hear Vincent mimic her – good times. I’m sure she was quite sorry that her guys lost – I was indifferent, and Todd was happy with the outcome as it helped him in his Fantasy Hockey league.

After the game we contemplated going to a bar, then a late night movie, then going bowling. When the bowling alley told us they weren’t allowing anyone else in, we decided to head home. I think we were both asleep in the living room by 11:15 – all I remember is Todd waking me up at 4:45 am and saying, “Let’s go get in bed”. Then I was wide awake and stressing about the new bedding and towels we’d gotten from Restoration Hardware. They just weren’t right. And it was quite heart wrenching to come to that conclusion since I’d spent the entire day shopping at four or five shops for the exact color of bath mats and other accessories to match – I’ve made so many returns in the past week of bedroom bathroom decor that I think I might get flagged as a compulsive returner in some of these stores. I’m trying to mix the existing brown stuff we have with a nice shade of blue – it’s not working. And people ask me why I never try a splash of color – why everything I have is brown. Well it’s because color sucks.

I’ve determined that I don’t have the ability to decorate…I know what I like when I see it, but unless I’m completely copying someone else’s idea, I’m no good at putting things together on my own. Won’t someone come over and help me? Or just do it for me? I’m tired of it. And if there were fewer shades of blue, I might be able to do it myself. But there aren’t. And blue sucks. And so does decorating.

Todd installed our new kitchen sink and faucet yesterday. I was so proud of him, and so thankful to have a husband who is handy like he is. He’s not afraid to tackle something new, and unlike me, he doesn’t really get frustrated with things. I heard him yell the “F” word once during the installation, but that was it. After he said it, he was right back to his laid back self. Even the multiple trips to Home Depot and Lowes didn’t get him down, he just kept on truckin’. During the process he said to me, “I want you to write about something on your blog, something that really frustrates me.” I thought for sure he was going to say something like, “Why can’t a sink install itself?” or “Why the hell can’t you just be happy with the white porcelain sink that came with the house?” or something, but it wasn’t about the sink at all: “Why, when you go to a store such as Wal-Mart, do you say hello to the greeter, and it’s not until you’ve already passed them by 10 feet that they decide to greet you?”

I suppose he’d been laying under the hole where our kitchen sink used to be, thinking about that. I thought to myself, maybe I should write a post about what a good person my husband is, and what a complaining bitch I am. But then I decided not to, because just about everyone who reads this blog knows about the differences between him and me.

I spent the day un-decorating our house. Nothing feeds one’s OCD like removing ornaments from a tree, I tell you. It was exhilerating – taking the ornaments down – removing all the green ones, then all the gold ones (first the big ones, then the medium sized ones, then the tiny ones, starting with the shiny ones and finishing with the matte-finished ones), then the birds, then the butterflies, then the icicles. And then putting them into the boxes. God, that felt good.

Happy New Year, everyone! And good luck with those resolutions.


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